Risk decision making in lending based on social media

Smile Index - Vanity

Before the Reserve Bank makes us cry, new levels of risk weightage must be set

Top executives of all the top banks came together after the RBI ordered not to give indiscriminate loans and increase risk weightage.

A worried executive says, 'First check if this order applies to Hon'ble Vijay Mallya, Nirav Modi, Venugopal Deut or just common loan holders?'

Another executive says, 'This is the only question. All the rules, orders, instructions of the Reserve Bank are for our common customers only.

Whereas in the case of Honorable Mallya and Modi, we are their families. So if there are any rules and laws to be made, then those people should make them and we should follow them.'

There was an exclamation of 'Hash...' from the whole room.

A third executive says, 'The Reserve Bank's new order is only for unsecured loans. Not for secured loans for houses, vehicles, gold deposits.'

A fourth executive fumed, 'All the words about secured, unsecured loans are false. Look, we used to think that the property taken by Hon'ble Mallya from Hon'ble Modi was worth 200 crores, if it turns out to be only two crores, the real estate recession is responsible for it, not Hon'ble Mallya or Modi.'

'Fact.' All the executives clapped their hands.

Those executives would say, 'Today, we are forced to live in the country where Mr. Mallya and Mr. Modi live, as our banks are not as comfortable with lunchtime rush hours as our banks, so we cannot take out our entire bank and take as many loans as they want, backing-at-the-doorstep. Cannot serve.'

After hearing this, two-four executives were shocked.

Finally, the most senior executive said, 'Before the Reserve Bank makes us cry, new levels of risk weightage must be decided.'

A young executive says, 'These days the country runs on social media. The popularity or quality of leaders, actors or even lorries standing on the road is determined only from social media. So let us decide the risk weightage of the loan from the social media profile of the people.

To consider those who make seven reels a day as hardworking and less risky for a loan, to increase the risk weightage of lazy people who do not exchange likes for likes or comments for comments. People who are constantly changing their status are considered to be very aware of their status, so it is considered less risky to give them a loan. People whose profile picture hasn't changed for hours have no social profile to consider as a loan risk.'

A senior executive says, 'What is the risk weight of people who have no social media profile?'

Those executives say, 'To believe that such people have been saved for life, bow down to such holy souls, that is, salute from nine yards away..!'

Smile tip

It should also be mandatory for leaders to show risk weightage whether they will work or not, join another party or not after being elected.